Humor

LOL Jets: Putrid Pick-6 City, Gang Green Trampled by the Colts

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The LOL Jets continued their losing ways with a 36-7 shellacking by the Indianapolis Colts. Quarterback Sam Darnold threw a Pick-6 twice, and tossed three interceptions. The Jets started the season 0-3 both straight up and against the spread, but if you’ve been betting against the Jets, you’d be a perfect 3-0 this season.

LOLJets LOL Jets Week 3 Colts
New York Jets QB Sam Darnold had an awful game against the Indianapolis Colts in Week 3. (Image: AP)

Meanwhile, Phillip Rivers used the hapless Jets to help pad his Hall of Fame stats. Rivers joined the exclusive 400 TD Club with an early touchdown strike.

In the first half, the Jets scored only once in their six possessions. The LOL Jets turned the ball over twice (via interceptions) and punted three times. That’s as good as it got.

Of course, the Jets went three and out for a punt in their first possession of the second half. On their second possession in the third quarter, the Jets got a first down on the first play for 16 yards, but then followed that up with a three-and-out for a punt. On the third possession in the second half, another Pick-6. D’oh! At that point, it was game over.

Damien Woody, former Jets O-lineman and two-time Super Bowl champion, went to social media to share his dissatisfaction with the Jets’ current status.

“Pitiful, pitiful game!” said Woody. “Three games, non competitive. Every game the Jets have played this year, they’ve been blown out by double digits.”

In the second half, the Jets punted three more times, allowed a safety, and scored zero points. The overall “Gase Punt to TD Ratio” in Indy was 6-to-1. Yup, fire Adam Gase ASAP.

Bad Darnold, Pick-6 City

It took five plays (or less than 90 seconds) before the Jets blew themselves up.

Sam Darnold threw a Pick-6 interception on the fifth play of the game. Xavier Rhodes returned the errant pass 43 yards for a touchdown. Ugly start against the Colts, but typical for the LOL Jets.

The Jets trailed 17-7 midway through the second quarter and wasted great field position after a 40-yard kick return from Josh Malone. Darnold rallied the troops and strung together a scoring drive. Well, almost. Darnold connected with Berrios for a 28-yard first down to penetrate the red zone. Instead of continuing to feed Frank Gore, Gase called a pass. Rhodes picked off Darnold in the end zone. It was Rhodes’ second pick in the first half. Gah!!!

Instead of heading into the locker room only trailing 17-14 at halftime, the Jets trailed by 10 points, with the Colts getting the ball to start the second half.

After punts on the first two drives to start the second half, Darnold tried to make something happen on the third drive. Instead, he threw a 31-yard interception for a touchdown and his second Pick-6 of the game.

Darnold Running for His Life

Let’s try to shine a little bit of love and light on the horrendous situation with the Jets. Darnold demonstrated a couple of glimpses of brilliance despite being under siege from the Colts’ pass rush for the entire game. He tossed a touchdown in the first half after a highlight-reel worthy scramble.

Darnold connected with Braxton Berrios for the touchdown on a broken play in which he scrambled for this life. Darnold evaded a couple of potential sacks, and found his new favorite target.

That’s just how Gase drew it up in the playbook!

Seems like the only time the Jets score touchdowns are either in garbage time or on plays that completely break down, forcing Darnold to improvise on the spot. Darnold has some skills, but he regresses every week that he runs Gase’s “genius” offense. It’s just a shame that a myopic coach like Gase is ruining his career.

Operation Fade the Jets: Now 3-0

Did you fade the LOL Jets this week? If you’ve been following along with us, we’re now 3-0 betting against the Jets this season. The Jets are 0-3 ATS and failed to cover the +11.5 cushion the bookies bestowed upon them in Week 3. It wasn’t even close.

The line opened at Jets +7 and bettors pounded the Colts all week. A few wiseguys took the Jets and points, but they were quickly reminded why that was a terrible idea.

“It’s embarrassing,” repeated Damien Woody. “I must like watching a trainwreck. That’s what I do every week. This is embarrassing all the way around. They out there getting smoked like a pack of Newports. Jets fans have been watching this BS for years. I will call them the ‘Newport Jets’ from now on because they’re always getting smoked!”

FADE THE LOL JETS
  • Week 3: Indianapolis 31, NY Jets 7
  • Point Spread: IND -9.5
  • Jets Record: 0-3 SU, 0-3 ATS
  • Fade the Jets Record: 3-0

Let’s fade the LOL Jets once again in Week 4, even though it’s a short week for Gang Green. The Jets host the Denver Broncos on Thursday Night Football.

The Broncos visit MetLife Stadium in New Jersey and its dangerous turf that eats up opponents ACL’s. Despite the bad turf and a backup quarterback at the helm, we will still back Denver -2.5 and lay the points.

We’ll continue to bet against the LOL Jets this season until they fire Adam Gase.

For weekly musings of a tortured New York Jets fan, take a look at more columns on the LOL Jets.

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